I don’t know, I really don’t….you let one book out the house for a blog tour and what happens? You get a dirty little stop-out on your hands – that’s what happens.
Of course, letting Nudey out into the elements was never going to end well. Just look at all these lovely peeps to pester and go out on the lash with.
Add to the mix that Nudey was feeling terrified about the whole thing…
Suppose everyone hates me? And I don’t even have a willy to tuck between my legs. Aaaaagh!!!
And then the worst happened…the first review came back as 2.5 stars out of 5….
Goodbye cruel world – we’ve had some japes and larks. A few steak suppers. But now the time has come to end it all. I’m shite…and now everyone knows it…
Then just as Nudey was mid-air, a belter of a review came through. Then another…then another. Until….
Here’s Nudey!!
Yes! Nudey was back. And with an ENORMOUS willy. And before too long it was all…
…a gargle-a-thon with new bezzies who totally ‘got’ Nudey…
Which ultimately led to…
…a mismanaged conga around the car park
But being a dickhead, Nudey just had to take things too far, and soon came crashing back to earth
Never fancy yerself Nudey. And take the bad reviews along with the good. Suck ‘em up. Learn from them. And get better. Dickhead.
And as God is my witness, they’ll never lick me. I’m going to live through this blog tour. And I’ll never be angry again at bad reviews. Or start thinking I’m much cop. As God is my witness.
Could murder a pork chop…
Written with thanks to the wonderful Anne Cater from Random Tour Things, who organised the whole shebang – which turned out to be a pretty damn fine and positive experience. And of course, thanks to the great reviewers.
PS – I can confirm that Nudey is now safely back home (albeit with a hangover) and plotting her next move.
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